(com)pressed for time

wednesday on the way to afternoon coffee i noticed him across the commons walking with friends, but pretended i didn’t. he waved for attention, and i smiled in his direction. raised my hand as if to indicate stop rather than anything more salutary. he immediately started bouncing in my direction. closing the gap with where are you off to, then? my explanation about coffee felt more pretentious than i’d considered. he kept slipping his right foot in and out of his sandals while he continued asking me awkward questions. i thought more about it being too cold for sandals than i did about the words spilling onto the red brick courtyard – bouncing around like empty aluminum cans. he eventually invited himself along, which struck at me oddly. he doesn’t drink coffee. we sat across from each other at a small square table. mauve, purple, beige faux marbled top. cheep peeling imitation wood grain edges. i commented that i don’t like faux finishes. and he sipped water and made a noncommittal face. i thought i might like to look into his eyes and that being there was a bad idea, while he told stories about camping trips and other matters. i laughed at all the appropriate times. started thinking it strange that he invited himself along. and wondered if all the men i know talk about literary theory when they are nervous. i told him if he referenced derrida one more time that i’d lose all faith in developing a friendship. we laughed. later he brushed his knee against mine. on the return walk, i said something that he called endearing while placing his hand momentarily at the small of my back. and i thought more intently about this being a bad idea.

friday evening. ready for my regular night of phone calls and too many drinks. already decked out in my pajamas. brrring. brrring. i answered. he asked if i was interested in getting together, and i felt shocked to hear his voice over the line. a party. coming by in 45 minutes. last minute get together. only if i’m interested. i thought to myself – no doubt i’ll be ready. sure, i said, sounds like fun.