decisions

before anything else, i decide to take a run. but it’s colder outside than i imagined. already aching, i set out. something’s wrong with my body. doesn’t want to go. have to stop after only a few blocks and walk -- feeling miserable and exhausted. go a few miles slowly. mad at myself for being weak and stupid, i turn around and run the rest of the way home. but really, I know, that making myself run home was the weak and stupid part.