this is the way things go

i'm sick
and tired of this day
and of myself and all the usless machinations that i use to cycle first against and then away
from all the things that seem undeserved
maybe i mean unrealistic
i was trying to write a post about a stevie wonder song i heard the other day at the airport
while i was waiting for a cab home
but it sounded more trivial than i intended
too pat
i said fuck this out loud and to the silent stillness of the room
and deleted the whole stupid jumbled mess

i should have been in bed hours ago