There are certain things that I just don't like doing. I don't like reading in the bathroom. It seems too much like mixing things that shouldn't be mixed. The passion of my life. Mundane bodily functions. And I don't like putting pens in my mouth. Not because I don't enjoy feeling the pressure of the plastic between my teeth--the slick cylinder against my tongue--or the slight crunch and yellow flake of a nice raw number two pencil. It's not those things at all. It's that when I'm sitting a particular way in my office chair. And because I always need a pen handy whilst reading or studying or doing any kind of thinking at all. And only when I sit in this one particular way. Which is the way I sit often. Legs half curled up into the seat. I stick the pen between the little toe and the next of my right foot and hold it there. I think I like the unnatural pressure it makes. Weird. And the slight distraction it provides. To keep my eyes flashing across these stupid little symbols that end up making words into stories in my head.